I received my final results back from my doctor on Tuesday. Essentially the results were inconclusive. –which is something that we knew would likely happen, seeing as though the NIVO drug would show inflammation. The somewhat good news was that it didn’t look like there was any cancer outside of my liver, which is a huge sigh of relief. However, after radiologists and both my oncologists read the results, here are the scenarios they gave me:
- either I have a bunch of new lymphoma growing in my liver, and the hemolysis or other weird liver condition is being masked by that, or…
- the “stuff” shown in my liver are dead hemoglobin cells from the hemolysis,or some other autoimmune disease, which could be treatable/treatable.
Obviously only a treatable #2 would be the best case scenario, but we won’t know anything until I meet with the liver oncologist to schedule another needle biopsy of my liver–(we meet Friday for consult, so I’m guessing surgery will probably be early next week). My oncologist told me that every single thing they are doing now is a 100% guessing game. both my regular oncologist and BMT doc, can’t provide a prognosis of any kind, which to be honest, I’ve stopped asking for. I know my cancer and my liver have acted way different than its supposed to, and I know I have a 50/50 shot.
And for the first time, I’m not quite as afraid anymore. Ever since what I will dub “the incident”, I have been making small goals. Shorter goals. Goals I’d love to reach just within a month or so. Next up, my birthday. March 19th. But let’s just take it one day at a time.
In other news, I’m suffering from muscle atrophy and muscle wasting in my legs, which is making it pretty hard to walk. I feel really weak because I’m only 93 lbs. (but don’t worry I have been eating, and I am determined!) My trainer Bob has been awesome in helping me get my shit together.
And so yet again, I will have to keep you posted. Praying the results of my biopsy show a cureable scenario #2, but either way, I was happy to wake up this morning. Where some might hear “ooooh your chances are pretty limited”, I hear, “so you’re tellin me there’s a chance!” Dumb and Dumber is actually pretty deep.
A special thank you again for everyone who donated to the fundraiser for my family. We are opening a college fund for Mack, and an interest bearing savings account. I’m so lucky to have such an amazing support system. ❤️🙌🏻