As mentioned, I’ve been feeling awful for 2 weeks, since my arrival here. I have had horrible heart burn, preventing me from eating and/or drinking anything, and making me puke. I’ve also had insomnia, headaches, blurred vision, dizziness, fevers, and joint/bone pain. Nonetheless, I vowed to myself before starting this journey (JOURNEY=DRINK!!!! –insider moment, sorry)–that I was going to at least walk every day no matter what. And I have. Even on the days where I came back from my walks, and puked, I still did it. And for that, I have to say I’m pretty proud of myself.
Two days ago, they started me on some IV prednisone (steroids), which is apparently to help prevent a lung infection. Rest assured, my first question was whether or not I was going to start to look like a Macy’s day balloon with a total puff face, but luckily, I wont since they are being administered via IV. Now the side effects suck. More insomnia, jitters, a general feeling of fogginess, an insanely horrid taste in my mouth–like rusty metal or something like that. BUT they are totally helping me not feel nauseous, and my heart burn is gone, so I’ll take it!
I had a few fevers over the past few days, and my counts simply weren’t coming up. I was really starting to get a little nervous there, but as it turns out, my cathetor line was infected, and needed to be removed! Once that was done, and I had a new pik line installed, I feel like a million bucks!…and no fevers…..and my counts are kicking ass. Which means…….I can a) ambulate on my own b) hold down food and drink c) produce healthy cells on my own. The three criteria for getting out of this place!! When my team came around today, they told me that as of right now, the tenative plan for discharge would be Monday. MONDAY!!!!!! I don’t want to jinx myself here, but it’s pretty hard not to get excited about that!!!
And here are just some other amazing perks: I have a ton of white blonde peach fuzz all over my head, and my eyebrows are starting to grow back. This def marks the quickest my hair has returned from chemo. Fuck yes. I met an awesome gal named Tamera who “lives” a few doors down from me. She is awesome. She has relapsed leukemia, and will be getting a bone marrow transplant. She has been great to walk with and talk to since I’ve been here, since we’re both the same age, and both have kids. (No one can ever take your place, KS, but thanks for sending her to me).
So now I’m finally starting to get excited. Mainly because I’m feeling better, and not feeling so sorry for myself all the time. But for the first time since I heard 50/50 shot of this working… To that I throw up my middle finger and say 100 fucking percent.