Discharge


I mean…who wouldn’t want to read a blog post with the title “discharge?”

Here’s the update: I GET TO GO HOME TONIGHT!!! WHOOP WHOOP!!!!
As it turns out, I wasn’t having Neutrapenic fevers after all. My blood cultures came back showing that I had a urinary tract infection. I had no symptoms, but apparently that is a common theme with me..:/ I haven’t had a fever since Sunday, and am able to get chemo today. It’s a late one though–I don’t think my chemo drugs will be ready from pharmacy until around 3:30pm, which means I wont even be done with chemo until around 7, but who cares. I get to go home when I’m done!

I met with Dr. C. today. She gave me the update regarding the spot found in my chest on my last PET scan. It was decided between her and the rest of the team that they are going to do nothing. lol….in other words, I WILL be done with chemo on June 19th. Only, I will not receive a PET scan immediately after to determine whether or not the cancer is totally gone. Instead we will wait 3 months, and I will have a PET at that time. I smiled and her and nodded when she was telling me this….attempting to keep my cool….but this is what I was really thinking:

WHA?!!!!!!! WTFFFFFFFFFF?!!!!!!!!!! WATCH AND WAIT??!!!!!!!!! EFFFFFFFFFFFFF UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

As always, I must give credit where credit is due. Dr. C. sure can read me like a book by now, since she said “I know you’re going to hate this”. Agreed. Anyway, the reason for waiting as she explained, is that with lymphonma in particular, oftentimes, inflammation can occurr in the body from chemo causing the “spots” to “light up” on the PET scan. So by waiting a little longer post chemo to have the PET scan, I believe she is expecting that spot to be gone. I told her what scared me was that the last PET scan didn’t show that all the cancer was gone, and by this point, that makes me pretty nervous. She told me that the spots that lit-up on my last PET follows the same theory–there is a possibility that it IS gone, and that the spots are simply inflamed cells/scar tissue/whocaresbecauseitsnotcancer. It took about 10 milliseconds to register, but I then asked her what perhaps some of you could be thinking…”SO I COULD POSSIBLY BE CANCER FREE RIGHT NOW?!!!!!” to which she responded….”YES”. It was the most beautiful “yes” I have ever heard 🙂

So even though I’m uber unlucky, and stats are pretty much never in my favor, I’m simply going to believe that I’m cancer free until my PET scan in Sept tells me otherwise. I’m feeling good (well mainly because I haven’t had chemo yet), I’m focused on the goal (June 19th last chemo), and I’ve got my eye on the prize (LIVING MY LIFE).

Additionally I am happy to report that while I’ve been here, I was visited by the Catholic volunteers daily, was able to receive communion, and it really did give me a feeling of peace. (It should be noted however that I’ve been on some killer anxiety meds while being here due to my bad anticipatory nausea, which COULD have something to do with it, but it felt good to believe in something again, even if it was partially medically induced).

I want to send a shout out to Miss Kandy, my awesome kick ass nursing assistant, who went out and bought me a pint of ice cream from Walgreens (the celebrity apprentice kind for anyone who watches). She has kept me company since my first day here, and her spirit is terrific. Kandy, if you ever read my blog, you should know–You may get stressed, and the physical part of your job may be difficult, especially as you get older…and maybe you don’t even get the credit that you deserve. But lady, you sure are GOOD at what you do. Trying to keep cancer patients positive is a hard task. And you’ve succeeded with me.

That’s all for a few days, as I will be sick. But at least I can be sick at home 🙂

One thought on “Discharge

  1. So awesome to hear, Mary! Still thinking/praying/hoping for you daily…stay positive…it makes all the difference!

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